Roses are red, Violets are blue. Get in the van.

What did the boy reading the book do? He kept turning pages and reading until he came to the end, closed the book, and put it back onto the book shelf.

How do you sabotage someone's car? Drop a fridge on it

How many of amanda todd's frinds does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick question, she doesn't have any

Why can't the T-rex clap? Because it's extinct

Whats red and yellow? A chicken in the blender.

What goes in dry, comes out wet and pleases two people. A teabag, you pervert.

What do Ethiopians do at night? Starve

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

What did the president say after his wife and kids left Him? Im Obama self now

After pursuing a speeding vehicle for 10km at speeds ranging from 120 - 160km/h, the police officer managed to stop the driver. The driver of the vehicle rolled down the window and asked, "What seems to be the problem officer?" to which the police officer replied, "It sounds like one of your cylinders is firing incorrectly, you have a fairly large amount of carbon build-up on and around your exhaust pipe."

What do you call mexicans running down the hallway? JAIL BREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yesterday I was diagnosed with Depression... It made me sad.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You shove her off the bed

have you seen ray charles' house? neither has he.

what do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

What hurts worse than a papercut? Divorce.

Yo momma so fat she when god said let there be let he said get the fuck out the way!

So a guy walks into a bar. He asks the woman next to him, ''Can I buy you a drink?'' The woman says,''No thank you.''

Why did the black guy scream? well, he just saw his friend get shot, and there was blood everywhere.

Q. whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A. A jew is a human of the jewish religion, and a pizza is food.

Why couldn't Jimmy breathe? He had a knife in his throat!

ARE YOU READY?! ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE!? YES I AM, AH! ARE YOU READY?! ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE?! The judge did not find the Elton John song worthy of negating the statuary rape charges and sentenced him to nine years in jail.

My computer crashed today I was watching porn.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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