Why did the old woman fall down She got shot

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Your mom is so fat, that she has unsightly stretch marks.

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What happens if you roll a nickel down a street in Mexico? It eventually stops and lands on its side.

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Say the line below sixteen times very fast: I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... Done? Good boy!

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What's green, and looks like money? Money...

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What is funnier than an anti-joke? My SAT scores.

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Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

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How did you know it was bedtime at Michael Jackson's house? When his clock's big hand met the little hand, usually at 10 or 11, though sometimes later if he had a concert that night.

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What do you call a pile of dead children? Home

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A blonde, red head and brunette decide the jump off a cliff....... They all die

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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what has two eyes and a face? the 5 year old who got raped on his way back home last night.

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whats bloody and mingen Scabbaz head

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Two muffins were in an oven. One muffin said "Wow, its hot in here." The other muffin said "Oh my gosh a talking muffin!" The house burnt down because the oven created a fire.

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whats worse than a worm in your apple? the holocaust whats worse than the holocaust? two worms in your apple

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Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Well, he was dangerously fatigued from having weeped passionately the entire night in the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of 20 years and consequently finding out that his only daughter was in a tragic school bus accident.

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Why didn't the girl take her hairbrush to school? She has cancer and all her hair fell out.

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a black guy with a parrot on his shoulder was walking down the street. another man asked, "where did you get him?" The parrot said, "theres tons of them in africa."

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Your momma is so dumb she has to have weekly tutoring to help understand finding the value of x in an equation.

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Two muffins were in the oven...They were taken out after about 40 minutes, and then enjoyed by all.

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Why was the woman bald? She was a Britney spears fan.

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what did God say on the 7th day? -zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

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A Rabbi walks into a bar. He payed for his drinks, tipped the bar tender, drank a few too many so he got a cab home.

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what is meaningless and not fun at all? that joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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