A car walked into a bar... wait no it didn't it has wheels.

Why didn't the man say, "Hello, Morgan Freeman!" when his friend walked by? Because his friend wasn't Morgan Freeman.

what do dead babies and turkeys have in common? you eat them on ocasions

Q: Why did the little boy who just got over a terrible sore throat fall down the stairs? A: His legs were brutally torn off by wolves.

What's the difference between a boodle and a scoodle? Ladoodle!

Why doesn't anybody like the octopus? There anti-social creatures by nature

knock knock who's there? Orange Oranges cant talk, so seriously, who's there Your mother Ha ha real funny -mother opens door with her key-

Why did the frog cross the street? To make babies

Why did the golfer take an extra pair of pants to the golf course? In case they ripped and he needed a replacement.

hey i just met you and this is crazy so heres my number actually is dolan

Yo mama is so fat , she died of a heart condition

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems make sense. 5

What do an eagle and a gopher have in common? They can both fly, except for the gopher

It is Scientifically proven that, if you have a shower in china... you get wet

how do you get a girl of a swing? puch her off! how do you get her friend of a swing? throw a refridgerator at her!

Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11

How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side

What did the pear say to the apple? Fred, you delusions are getting worse and i'm getting a divorce.

Why did the black person eat fried chicken Because fried chicken tends to be an abundant food in the African American community and that was the quickest and cheapest weekend afternoon food source nearest to his house. It is also found in many other communities throughout the country and even the world. Oh yeah, he was hungry

How can a chicken be dirty? It can be covered in dirt!

I was at work today and whilst staring at my beautiful colleague I realised how hard it had got. So I quit

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was holding hands with the first. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It saw a banana. Why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? It slipped. Why did the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? It thought this was all a game. Why did the sixth monkey commit suicide? All his friends were gone.

A blonde is elected President of the United States. Half way through her inauguration speech, she forgets how to read.

Two Jews walked into a bar. Then bought it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...