Your mom is so fat, she had liposuction.

An owl and a squirrel where siting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl then turned to the squirrel and said nothing... cos owls can't talk. The owl then eats the bird because it is a bird of prey

420

Why did Sally's Ice Cream melt? Sally was on Fire

Why is there no gambling in Africa? Because there's no money in Africa.

Will there be love in your future? Click the hand with the love-line that is closest to yours

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, Who shit in my garden?

womens rights.

a duck walks up to a lemonade stand, says to the man running the stand. quack, because he's a duck

Roses are red Violets are blue Actually they're purple That's why they're called "violets"

Nero I know I am being a selffish bastard, but please let me speak with you for ten more minutes or so, I am sorry but its like part of me do not believe its you, we all saw your corpse, attended your funeral, please stick with me, I just feel flustered vulnerable and stupid.

who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Osama Bin Laden

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

whats funny about a jew burning? Nothing......

Chuck Norris' balls were so big that he went to the doctor to get them checked on and it was discovered that he had testicular cancer.

How do you stop a group of black guys from fighting? go over to them and ask them politely to stop.

why did josh pick up the quarter because he's a jew

Why didnt the car turn on? Cause the keys werent in the ignition

Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

A duck, a rabbi, a homosexual, and the president walk into a bar. As a result, bruises appeared on their foreheads.

What did the girl with two broken legs give her parents for Christmas? Medical bills.

shit is shit, even if you paint it purple; its still shit

what do you call two arabs flying a plane? a pilot and a co-pilot

Q: what do you call a camel with a garbage bag on its head? A: A ziploc baggie

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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