Why did Michael Vick run? Because he was being chased by defenders.

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You wanna know something that's totally out of this world? The moon.

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Three Greeks and Three Turks are traveling by train to a conference. Both racial groups arrive safely to their destination.

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Roses are, blue, Violets are red, Screw poetic forms, I wish you were dead

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A child logs on to antijoke.com he is a chronic masturbator

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Axel? Its Eliza, is that you? You alive again? I don't want to be no successor of anything, but thanks I guess. Neo-Nero has not shown up since you returned, I think he isn't very proud of himself and wont be a problem here on forward. He did push me aside, but now that you are alive, I wont even consider the thought of you "dying again" and unless you are dying or seriously ill, I don't want to hear anything about it. Seriously, how bad are you doing? Physically I mean? I am relieved, I mean we all thought you where dead.

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What did the disabled child say when I hit him with my car? *thunk*

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what did the addidas sign say to the nike sign? I'm all in

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Hey do you know who is in the yard? Not the boys, they all died in a horrific fire last Christmas.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? Because it is the decaying remains of a corpse and therefore lacks brain and muscle tissue depriving it of the ability of though and movement both of which are key skills in the art of dancing.

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Okay, after this one then...

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Thats sweet, thank you then.

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How did the black man get into college? A mop.

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Your mother's breath smells so bad that it just doesn't smell very good at all.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black Im blind

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Why did Sally fall of the swing? She had no arms! Knock knock! Who's there? Not Sally becase she fell off the swing.

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What did OJ Simpson say to the blonde? "Don't worry, I'm not going to murder you"

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What did the Joker say to Batman? Why are we wearing these stupid costumes

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*ahem* what? what. oh I thought you said something

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Why did the Middle east send Doris a camel's penis? Because Uncle Monty's head was damn tasty

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What did the mother say to her son? I have Leukemia.

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Ask me if I'm a horse. Are you a horse? No.

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Here is an opposite. Black Santa Claus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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