Q: why was the cat naked? A: its owner was drunk and thought he was shaving his own head.

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Penis

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Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? It got hit by a stone. Why did the second Koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by the first Koala. Why did the third Koala fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game. Why did the Kangaroo die? It was hit by three falling Koalas.

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Q: Why did the man cross the road? A: Cause he felt like it.

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So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

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Hey, look over there! It's ur mom!

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Most of these Anti-Jokes are Anti-Anti jokes, which makes them funny, if they were actually Anti-Jokes they wouldn't be funny at all.

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What's black and white and red all over? A panda with red paint splattered on it

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And the guy who played Trapper John on MASH wins the coveted 'Last Famous TV Person to Die in 2015' award!!! Woooooooo!!!!

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roses are reddish voilets are blueish if it weren't for christmas we'd all be jewish

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Two dogs went out for a walk. Then their master took them home.

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the car? Get in the car.

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Why didn't the girl get on the school bus? It was Sunday.

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What color was the fence before it was painted green? Not green.

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What's the difference between a truckload of dead babies and a truckload of bowling balls? You can't unload the bowling balls with a pitchfork.

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What happened to the guy that took to many lunesta pills? He fell asleep but he was glad it was the weekend or he would have been late for his job

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What's great about taking a shower with a twelve year old girl. Pulling her hair back and making her look like a six year old

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What's the difference between a Mustang and a sack of dead babies? I don't have a sack of dead babies in my garage.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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Do you know the reason people like sleeping? It's because they have good dreams. Ooh la la.--

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Why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because you would get charged with vehicular manslaughter and have the NAACP all up in your ass.

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Q:Why did the retarded student get called down to the office? A:Because both his parents died in a car accident.

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What do you do when your phone goes off in class? Stay behind after class whilst the teacher takes off his pants and tells you do bend over a desk. This is your punishment.

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a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar they are good friends and enjoy alcoholic beverages.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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