Robin- Hey, Batman, can i drive tonight? Batman- Eat my left dick Robin- OK, Batman, but can i still ... mmuupfm fmuupmf... I suppose that means no... mmmupf mmfupfmpfmum...

Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the fourth panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. -BG_Shank_A

What is the difference in a dead dog in the road, and a dead black guy in the road? One was a dog and one was a human being..

who has brown eyes blonde hair and red lips a human-being

An American guy, Chinese guy, and Black guy are on a boat. Who jumps off first? Hopefully no one jumps off, especially because the ocean current is strong. They should call the coast guard if they are lost and find a safe way back to shore.

A priest walks into a bar, which is suprising because priests don't usually go to bars.

Yo mamma's so fat, she died of diabeties and we all mourn her loss.

Why did girl cry? Because she recently saw the messy demise of her parent's marriage.

How do you make a baby cry? Break its legs.

I hate girls that try to act hard. Like calm down you dont got a dick.

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

why did the rabit lose the race? it was a dumb@$$

"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

So these two gay guys walk backwards into a bar.

*Tell your listener to say knock knock* B: Knock knock A: Who's there? B: *awkward silence

Why did the alligator travel through time? To get to the other side.

A: Knock knock B: Who’s there? A: The police B: The police who? A: Ma’am, your son is dead.

"Ask me if I'm a banana." "Are you a banana?" "No."

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why'd the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey Why'd the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure Why'd the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? his girlfriend broke up with him so he commited suicide Why'd the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? cuz it was a dumbass

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had no arms.

Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Oranges don't talk

You wanna hear a real joke? Well, look at the post below this one.

What did the alien discuss with the other alien? Something we discussed.

Reporter: So, how do you feel knowing you don't have some place to work when you walk out of your house because of that tornado? Guy: "Well, it feels even worse knowing I don't have a house to walk out of. . ."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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