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A blonde brunette and redhead all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? The brunette because she jumped first

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whats worse then 9/11? -George W. Bush

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why couldn't the little girl play on the swing? Matty Russel was chasing her

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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I hate it when i don't forward an email and then i die the next day.

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My friend told me to break a leg before the show. I disobeyed him and injured no one. It's just a figure of speech.

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Why did the boy punch his teacher? Muscle spasms.

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Why did the man with no arms, and no legs knock on your door? He can't, he has no arms!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he could beat the oncoming car.

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3 guys walk into a bar to tell an anti joke. The bartender asks them to leave.

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What did the clerk say and do when he was givng out free food What he did:Gave them What he said:"If you want to get this free, pay $5.00"

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if japanese cars are called riceburners would german cars be called jewburners

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Waterboarding.

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What do you call a kid without brothers or sisters What? a chinese Boy!!!!!!! lol ;)

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A white man asks a black man, "Did you fall into a chimney?" and laughs. The man proceeds to wash off his hands and face to reveal beautiful, dark-brown skin. Then they both joke about it because they are best friends.

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What's brown and sticky? a stick

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What happens when you stick your finger in a pencil sharpener? Blood everywhere.

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How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him Food Stamps.

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Uh, "Abel", seriously get over here and then get some sleep, not only did you get the code all wrong, there is no number to be deciphered at all, besides its called a laptop with a battery. Speaking of general dumbass... You have not changed the least, you really remind me of a cruel, sloppy, less disciplined (except the wise cracking thing Nero resorted to to push me away and apparently dodge gun fire, maybe his way of handling nerves. You might look like him, but personality wise you are completely different, cruel, sloppy, graphical, I mean did you ever see Nero get angry? I never did. That said Neo-Nero, you are a nice guy too, especially if you get here fast enough, I mean this place is freezing.

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why did the rabit lose the race? it was a dumb@$$

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

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What did the midget say to the clown that was blocking the doorway? Excuse me

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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