How do you make a car? You build it.

What do you call five white guys sitting on a bench? the NBA

What's small, black,and crispy? A baby after an apartment fire

Vagina cream... end of story

What's worse than getting an F on your paper? Walking in on a man wearing your mother's skin after vigorously raping her in front of your baby sister.

A man with ADD walks into a bar, what did he say? Look a squirrel!!!

What's long, hard, and full of seamen? An ejaculating penis.

Q. why did the plane crash? A. because the pilot was a loaf of bread

Why don't mummies take vacations? They're dead.

what do u get when two cars collide... a bunch of mexican

ask me if im a fence are you a fence WALNUTS!

People made fun of a plant for walking into a bar. Little did they know it hadn't been watered for days.

Train A leaves the station at 1:42 while traveling in 176kmh. How long will it take for the conductor to realize the bridge it ou... Too long.

How do you stop a cat from urinating on your floor? Shoot it.

Bags of delicious poop.

Caller:Hello, is this Smellma Pitts Answer: Why yes

Sixty... eight

Why did the boy tell the fly to eat the cheese? A: because he wanted him to

theres a kitten stuck in a tree, whats wrong? it's dead

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck would chuck wood? The etymology of the name woodchuck is unrelated to wood or chucking. It stems from an Algonquian (possibly Narragansett) name for the animal, wuchak. The similarity between the words has led to the common tongue-twister that you have just stated.

Why was the anti joke funny? because it wasn't funny.

whats worse than being raped by a random stranger getting raped by your uncle

A kangeroo is stuck in a tree with no headlights, how many waffles does it take to get to the moon? NO, silly. Snakes don't have armpits.

Adam ci ?mierdz?cy kutas mi sie ya mam

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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