Your Momma is so fat when she pressed "up" on the elevator it went crashing down.

why does Chuck Norris never get wet in the rain? Because he has a very serviceable umbrella

What is black and white and red all over. A pile of dead zebras

Knock knock? Who's there? Cancer Cancer who? After some time and various bouts of radiation and chemotherapy, he finally lost his life to the terrible disease.

I was once a hamster.

How many black people does it take to complete the simplest task such as washing their own hair? A **** load! thats why slavery was so populer back in the day. (and gays were big then to because they had to shower together to remember to wash their hair).

what happens when you put samuel jackson on a plane with snakes? They make a movie

Roses are red but violets arent blue!!!!!

Why are Jews always so clean? Because they never come out of the shower.

A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

Q: What were Peter's emotions after he bought his $2 million house? A: None, in fact he has no home, family and anyone to help him. his leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

Q:How do you know if you have a big enough oven? A: If the jew fits

How much booze did the homeless man drink? All of it. He is severely depressed.

An owl and a squirrel watch a farmer walk by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing because owls are not capable of human speech. The owl then eats the squirrel because the owl is a bird of prey.

Knock knock ... *No ones home*

What do you get if you cross a nan and a car? A squashed dead nan who released their bowels and your grandads face who was also dead as they had a cardiac arrest

you and your family will die tonight

i was scrolling through the anti-jokes and saw one that just said refridgerator. i laughed. penis.

A plane crashes in the wilderness on the border of Canada and the U.S. Where do they bury the survivors? I lied. There were none.

A Man Walks Into A Bar. He's Immediately Rushed To The Hospital.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It heard you like to choke the chicken.

Why did the kid eat his homework because the teacher said it was a piece of cake

Name an American born white man in the NBA. Thats right, you cant

Q: you know whats a good movie? A: twilight.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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