Your mama's so fat, that at her last annual checkup her attending physician informed her that it would be in her best interest to diet and exercise before her obesity manifested itself in a variety of chronic afflictions that would detract from her ability to lead a long life.

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Why couldn't 7 multiply itself by 18? Because there were two people having sex in between them.

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Why can't Helen Keller conduct a Train. Because she is dead.

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why did the chicken cross the road? Does it matter why, it just did.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Im a dog. RUUUFFF!

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Is your refrigerator running? No. That is highly improbable because a refrigerator has no arms or legs, also a refrigerator is not a human being, or alive in any manor and therefor cannot be moved with out an external force acted upon it.

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Your momma's so fat that she is at risk for heart disease and diabetes.

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There are two monkeys sittingn a bathtub. The first one says, "Scratch my back Mack." The second one says, "That's okay Joe I've got a radio of my own." (laugh like you think it is funny)

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What has two wheels and a handle bar? A bike.

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A snail walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "hey we don't serve snails here," and flicks him across the street. 3 years later the snails walks back into the bar and said, "why'd ya do that for??"

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Why did Sally flunk math? Because she didn't achieve the passing grade which is 60 percent or greater. She might need some tutoring in order to master the concept of the lessons to which she has difficulty solving.

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I came home from my doctor`s appointment today, I told my sister that I was diagnosed with The Super rare "Spontaneous Erections Syndrome" (S.E.S) a very rare disease that can seriously impair the victims life in general, especially the social life, as symptoms may show themselves even among friends, pets, grandmas, enemies, and even close family! She told me that everybody knows I a just a kinky pervert with bulge so big it scared girls away instead of attracting them. Excuse me, what the hell is patient confidentiality good for if my doctor is going to call my sister and tell her everything she said to me afterwards?!

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This comment has been removed for too many average votes.

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Why do basketball players wear bibs? They don't.

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Whats 2+1? 2.

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A bear walks into a bar and kills every one

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Knock knock How is ? Bond ,James Bond!

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Why cant jonny walk? He has no legs.

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Knock knock. Who's there It's Jim O ok come on in

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Some people are like Slinkies: they don't work as well as they say they will and you'll get bored of them quickly.

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Have you seen the painting by Stevie Wonder? It's a Monet and this museum's most prized piece. Just kindly ask Mr. Wonder to step aside a bit.

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What's harder than winning an argument with a woman. Lonsdaleite which has recently been declared the hardest substance known to man, and can withstand 58% more stress than the hardest diamond crystal.

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What does a horse and a donkey have in common? They are both very different from trees

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What's the difference between a plane and a Muslim dentist? A plane hasn't dedicated its life to the study of dentistry

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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