Why did the chicken cross the road? Why do you care what a chicken thinks?

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A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. He was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral.

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Q: What's the difference between a stick in the road and a baby in the road? A: You swerve around the stick

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Why did the farmer name his pig "ink"? He had a terrible case of dementia.

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Poop

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What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

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What did the P.E. coach say to the fat kid? you need to exercise

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Did you hear about the guy who broke his legs? His legs were broke.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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What did the cow say to the farmer? moo

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LAST COMMENT? DISGUSTIIIING! NO YOU TAKE IT!

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What do you call a fat man in a tiny pipe? Stuck.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to severely injure a human.

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uas;ugbasrG "khVESGF;OQWAEFH;OASEHFO;SAEFUASUusa;uefSOEHFSOEHDF;oasehf;oasehf;uoashvo;uasfo'H EF;owefhoaw;sefoasjefpiwaejf MINTY FRESGH

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Why did the golfer take an extra pair of pants to the golf course? In case they ripped and he needed a replacement.

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Are you black? Kill yourself.

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roses are red, violets are blue, tom cruise is gay

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Your mom is so fat she wears large clothes

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Whats Big, Brown, and smells like Horse Crap? Horse Crap

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Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium BATMAN! Oh cemetery jokes

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what does a black person and an elephant have in common? what? they are both living beings who have their place in the world.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Adolf Hitler. Adolf Hitler, who? Be quiet and hand over your Jews!

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Q.What has flashing lights and really bad dancing A.Baby haveing an eppilectic fit

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--IT'S PEANUT BUTTER JELLY TIME!! --no it isn't. a clock only has numbers 1-12 for hours and 1-60 for minutes. "peanut butter jelly" is not in any of those number sets. what are you taking about?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops