Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was a cold day

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TEST! ACTUALLY READ THIS! 1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. 2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. 3. The King of the Forest is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend except one. Which animal does not attend? The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. This tests your memory. 4. There is a river you must cross but it is inhabited by crocodiles. How do you manage it? You swim across. All the crocodiles are attending the animal conference.

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what happens when a white guy goes to harlem he gets robbed by 5 to 10 black men

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There are ten million million million million million million million million million million million sub-atomic particles in the universe that we can observe. Your mamma took the ugly ones and put them into one nerd...

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot.

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out of your comfort zone

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Why did the student shoot his teacher? Because he was super depressed and was just diagnosed with stage four brain cancer. And he was black.

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how do you get a man with a gun out of your house? you don't.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being molested by a giant octopus.

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Why does the easter bunny hide his eggs? Because he wants to hide the fact he knocked up a chicken.

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Patient: "Doctor I think I might be a homosexual." Doctor: "How can you tell?" Patient: "RAAIIINNBOOOOWW!!!"

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The MLS

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What did the boy say to his friend? "Hello!"

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Roses are red violets are blue I am in 301 Club and so are you.

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Q: How does a robber get into your house? A: Through a door.

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Why didn't the girl paint her nails white? Because in this society, that would be considered racist.

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why did simran go to jessicas house? To go have a human taco

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being dragged to his death by an 18 wheeler.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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What color is the white cup? It's blue because it has two handles.

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Who did you see last night? Nobody, no one wants to see you.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue I suck at poetry, Show me your tits

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Jimmy and Ted are racing each other at the end ov the street. Jimmy is taller and thinner but Ted has more endurance. Who wins the race? A: the drunk driver

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Yo mama's so fat, she's at risk for a number of obesity related disseases, including diabetes, hypertension, and heart dissease.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops