Who gets more action than my best friend Reese? My raped cousin....

why does a man walks into a bar? it was a metal bar so he probably was retarted

I was once a hamster.

Roeses are purple violets are green WTF u just stabbed me.

When Santa got stuck up the chimney he began to shout.. But he didn't shout for long as he soon succumbed to the toxic smoke and died of carbon monoxide poisoning

Why didn't the man go to work? He got stabbed.

You know what is worse than being dead...being at a Justin Bieber concert

Q:How do you know if you have a big enough oven? A: If the jew fits

If there's something strange in the neighborhood, who you gonna call? The police, because it's obviously a darky that's up to no good.

Why did twenty mexicans run down a hill? There was a marathon in the area.

Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews undergo metabolism, maintain homeostasis, possess a capacity to grow, respond to stimuli, reproduce and, through natural selection, adapt to their environment in successive generations. More complex living organisms can communicate through various means.[1][5] A diverse array of living organisms (life forms) can be found in the biosphere on Earth, and the properties common to these organisms—plants, animals, fungi, protists, archaea, and bacteria—are a carbon- and water-based cellular form with complex organization and heritable genetic information. Pizza does not.

Jane asked her husband why he was crying, he replied "Because i have extremely agressive cancer" hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.....Cancer

They say once you go black, you never go black. But clearly they weren't referring to Nigel, who had an average-sized penis at best.

What's the difference between a black male and a white female? There are many differences but all of which are wrong to make a joke about.

One day i woke up, and found my wife dead on the floor. lol.

Have you noticed when you see geese flying and they're in a V pattern, often one side will be longer than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side.

Nickleback.

What do you get when you mix carbonated water, caramel color, aspartame, phosporic acid, potassium benzoate, caffeine, citric acid, and natural flavor? Diet Pepsi

What is yellow and smells like a flower? A yellow flower :)

A duck walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "What'll it be?" The duck says that he should get his doctor on the phone because his hullucinations are getting worse.

Do you know what's funny? 9/11

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Why did the little girl fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? I don't know but it's not the little girl.

What do you call a bitchy unreliable friend? You don't call that bitch at all.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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