How many Muslims does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

What did the collage professor say to the plumber? Hi.

The black man leaves the strip club.

how do you get a girl of a swing? puch her off! how do you get her friend of a swing? throw a refridgerator at her!

Yo mama is so fat she probably has diabetes, poor circulation in her extremities, and cannot ride anything at Disney World.

How can you tell when a African man is lying? Like any other person you would use a lie detector.

Did you know, even though penguins ARE birds... They don't live in volcanoes?

How old is your mom Dead

What would you do if the house you're sitting in now exploded? Nothing really, you would have died a horrible death.

Z.

You know what's bad? Running over a baby with a truck. You know what's worse? Skidding on it.

Other Guy: What are you looking at? Me: You.

Why does 1 + 1 = 2? ....seriously P

A: Knock Knock (waits for an answer) oh there's no one in.

it was a breazy night my pecker was shriveld up like a loose bit of ham. i tucked it in between my legs and dicided to pull my pants down to my ancles and began to run like a sissy. i saw a stumpy little juice ed in the distance it was peter andre he told me that he wanted a slut fucken and said he wanted to pull my banjo right back to the balls and suck it till the moon goes down i cumed all over his glasses then we began to kiss i bent over for him and he stook is fat fucken trout in my dark tight cave there was swet dripping from my cock aka carl mcvittie

what did Susie, the girl with no arms, say after she fell off the swing? nothing, she was killed on impact.

how do you wake up lady gaga you poke her face

A black man walks into a store and buys something.

What's worse than slipping on a bannana peel? The Gestapo. Go to Aushwitz now.

Why can't Tom Maynard play cricket anymore Because he's dead

Why isn't pluto a planet anymore? Nasa decided it was too small

I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

general tso's broccoli

What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the bat mobile? Robin,get in the bat mobile.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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