Two Jews walk into a bar. They promptly order their drinks and leave.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The third one is for you

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Roses are red, Violets are blue At least that's what I've been told But honestly I've never seen those flowers so I wouldn't know.

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Why did the baby fall down from the tree? It was dead.

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._____________________. Whale!

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A slutty deer walks into a bar she then comes out and says wow i cant believe i blew 30 bucks

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What did the fish say to the octopus? nothing... fish cant talk.

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What's Green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A co-pilot

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I was watching this movie..... its over now.

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roses are blue, violets are red, im colorblind

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What does a muslim do on a plane? Flies to his intended destination without causing a problem.

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There once were 2 cowboys who were lost on a dusty trail. Later on they found their way out and are now doing very successful

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Why did the Black guy work at KFC? To provide money for his struggling family.

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Two people were playing Monopoly. One was a blonde and one was black. The blonde said, "your turn".

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What's the difference between a duck? both of it's legs are the same.

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Why did the spider cross the road? He was stuck to the bottom of my shoe!

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What happened when the man killed a baby? He was captured by the authorities and sentenced to life in prison.

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Why was a woman crying in a corner of a room She was raped

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Cheese stick

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a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

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1.Roses Are Gray, Violets Are Gray. I Am A Dog. Can I Eat Your Leg? 2.What Did The Sandwiches Say To The Grilled Cheese? Nothing. Sandwiches Can't Talk Due to The Lack Of Organs.

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I used to work at a chemical plant manufacturing hydrochloric acid. I couldn't handle it. One day a container exploded and I got severe chemical burns on my face. The scarring is awful. It has ruined my life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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