How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb? Any number of chickens plus one person.

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What is worse than burning your toast? - Obama

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I asked a Jewish girl for her number. she rolled up her sleeve.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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A man is being followed by a large swarm of mosquitoes. He eradicates them by spraying himself with an insect repellent that has a high deet concentration.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the poor thing is so confused and is seeking a near by farm.

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Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

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How many Jews died in the Holocaust? Not enough.

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Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

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How come the black man couldn't be seen on film? He could be seen on film, he's not a vampire.

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Why isnt there a womens NASCAR? Because NASCAR does not yet have the funding to start a women's league.

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What do you call a black man in space? an astronaut

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A priest, a rabbi, and a Buddhist monk walk into a bar. They discuss their differences over a pint of beer and leave with a greater understanding of each other's faiths.

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whats funny with two wheels? A kid falling off his bike

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Why does steve wonder always smile? He doesn't know he's black

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Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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What's yellow and can not swim? A Bulldozer

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Reporter: So, how do you feel knowing you don't have some place to work when you walk out of your house because of that tornado? Guy: "Well, it feels even worse knowing I don't have a house to walk out of. . ."

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What's green and fluffy? Red fluff, if you're color blind.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

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Why is the kid over-weighted? Because he had to many calories in his diegestive system and he couldn't burn the calories

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What's green and falls fom a tree? A dump truck. I lied about it being green.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops