A guy walks into a bar. He now has a broken collar bone.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research.

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If you wanna hear a joke scroll down this page more

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a black man jumps in a pool.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am not using commas That is improper punctuation.

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A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they got married and lived happy together for the rest of their lifes.

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Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

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holocaust jokes are bad, anne frankly they annoy me

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

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Hey you want to here a joke? I can't think of one

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How do u know someones running? They leave this????behind

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Why did the bartender tell the black man to "Get Out"? It was 4 a.m and the bar closed at 3:30 a.m an honest mistake by the man.

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How many eco-friendly people does it take to change a lightbulb? Nobody knows because fluorescent lightbulbs last 6 to 12 years longer than an incandescent lightbulb.

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A: Knock knock B: Who’s there? A: The police B: The police who? A: Ma’am, your son is dead.

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if a bra is called a over the shoulder boulder holder what is male underware called sincerly, under the butt nut hut

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What's te best part about having sex with twenty two year olds? There are 20 of them ;)

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why did the chicken cros the road? Becuase the all the cars were stopped at the near by red light.

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A priest walks into a bar, which is suprising because priests don't usually go to bars.

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The Paralympics! Even if you win, you're still retarded!

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What do you get when you cross Justin Bieber and One Direction? A bunch of gay pop stars.

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A man took his son out to play catch. The boy didn't even try to catch the ball. After that the man took his son to the amusement park to have fun. The boy didn't even try to have fun. Then the man took his son to the burger place nearby. Once again the son didn't even touch his food. Finally the man lost his temper and beat his seemingly ungrateful son and cried over the fact that his son was mentally retarded.

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Why'd the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Two ducks are sitting on washcloths in the middle of a lake. One duck looks to the other and asks, "hey, do you have any soap?" to which the other duck responds, "what do you think I am, a typewriter?"

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What did the girl fruit say to the boy fruit when he wanted to marry her? "No."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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