two cannables walk in to McDonalds

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An overzealous adventurer takes a trip to the Congo in Central Africa. While exploring the dense jungles, he accidentally drinks water that is contaminated with a very rare virus. He lives through the pain of the virus for many years. About 10 years after his trip to Africa, researchers discover a cure for the adventurer's virus. He goes to the clinic to get his shot to kill the virus. Exhilarated, the now cured adventurer runs out of the clinic but fails to look both ways while crossing the street and gets hit by and ambulance and dies.

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Two scuba divers are playing cards on the bottom of the ocean. One asks "have you got amy threes?" Then they both die from maintained exposure to the incredible pressure at the bottom of the sea. One left behind three children.

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what did the blond do after she turned 18? Reelected Obama.

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Knock knock ... *No ones home*

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What's funny about a man walking into a bar? He was a clown.

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Why did the crocodile cross the road? It is actually highly improbable that such a large reptile would be in a residential area where such roads would exist.

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What kind of cheese isn't yours Nacho Cheese actually it depends on the type of cheese that you stole due to your kleptomania

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How much booze did the homeless man drink? All of it. He is severely depressed.

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Knock knock Who's there Fetty Fetty who? Fetty Wap Hey what's up hello

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whats worse than god meaner than the devil. the poor have it the rich need it nothing

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If Chuck Norris has $5 and you have $5 then all together you have $10. It was announced that the obverse portrait of Alexander Hamiliton would be replaced by the portrait of an undecided woman, starting in the year 2020. If you wait long enough, you can exchange the $10 for the new $10 bill.

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What's worse than a spray tan? - A spray tan of hydrochloric acid.

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Why does Stuart go to Zu Bar? Because he deals cocaine to his fellow raving companions

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What's the difference between working at Mc Donalds and working as a hooker? A hooker gets paid more.

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Penis

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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what do you call a baby in a blender? A really funny event.

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Why was the black man forced off of the roller coaster He had heart disease

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yo' Mamma's so fat when she stepped on the scale, she said "hey, that's my phone number"!

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I did your mom-A FAVOR-by making you-A SANDWICH-my favorite part was when she stripped-THE LETTUCE-then i touched her boob-OO-then we fucked

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whats worse than jonny james obviously

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What's black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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Why did Bob fall off the swim? He had no arms or legs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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