Knock! Knock! Who's There? The Police. Open the damn door. Nobody Is Home.

What did the quarter say to the dime? nothing.

Why little Susie often molested as a child? She was probably a good-looking child.

why did the kid get home from school early cause he was home from school..

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks him, "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply, because horses cannot talk.

A doctor walks into a bar. It's his day off and decides to celebrate after a long week of working.

What did the ocean say to the black guy? Nothing, it just shot him.

Why did Winston Churchill cross the road? Grave robbery has become a huge problem lately in the United Kingdom.

Q:What happened when Smokey the Bear was the one who started the forest fire? A: He got arrested just like you would have

What do you call a car with a sunroof? A car.

Why did the kid have no arms? A clown came and chopped them off.

i have a black person in my family tree he's still hanginh

Man in Balcony: You're telling it wrong!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them

Why couldn't the skeleton cross the road? Because it was dead, thus incapable of independent movement.

if my evil next door neighbor is building a rocket to steal the moon with the help of 3 little girls, a grumpy old man and about 5000 small yellow poeple; what do i do? get sued for coping a copyrighted movie plot

What's worse than carrying a heavy suitcase? Poisoning children.

Hey "Oren" its Red, sorry but I got to go now. How you been doing? Kinda missed you over here. So you actually care about how you sound now?

A man called the police and was later arrested for murdering himself,

It was Valentines Day today, I thought I should get her something... I brought flowers to her grave.

What do you call a man with no home or family? Charles Manson…He currently resides in jail.

A black guy walks into a resturaunt. he finishes his drink, graciously tips the bartender and leaves.

why did the car crash? Because the driver was just a box of raisen Brand

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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