Q: What did the dog say to the cat? A: animals don't talk

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Fine, just remember that I want to help you, but you cannot ask me for help, and then throw a shitstorm of accusations at me, I have never worked for the feds and never will, I know nothing about their code of operations nor... Anything really. Let me give you an advice, I know that at least two people you trusted deeply betrayed you, but if you are not going to trust anyone again, then leave point zero while you still can do so alive. And no babe, this is not a threat, its advice.

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I can't make my mind about the debate on legalisation of marijuana. Some days I think it's a good thing. Somes days I think it's a bad thing. And some days, I don't think about it at all and I just think it's a very nice day.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Shit a brick.

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Moderately entertaining story, friend.

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What's the difference between a Mustang and a sack of dead babies? I don't have a sack of dead babies in my garage.

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What do you get when you cross a celebrity with drugs? A highly probable circumstance.

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Why is Taylor sad? Because she's the middle of a human centipede.

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What's under the first mate? The second mate.

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how do you get blondes to drown? stick a mirror to the bottom of the pool

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer left his fence open and the chicken happened to cross a road.

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Roses are red violets are blue hes for me not for you if by chance you take my place ill take my fist and smash your face

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why did the man hit the flight attendant? Im just kidding he didnt.

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Q: How did the black man cross the Atlantic? A: He flew with an airliner, a large fixed-wing aircraft for transporting passengers and cargo.

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yo mama so stupid, she went to the super bowl an bought a spoon

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What did the skinny man say to the fat woman. That sucks.

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How high is a Chinaman

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knock knock Who's there Hi, im a memeber of the Church of Latter Day Saints. Id like to talk to you about our lord and savior Jesus Christ

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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Take sebastian deep into the woods and put him down quickly

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Roses are red violets are blue I think you re stupid go eat a shoe

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no hands.

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A Rock accidentally fed a giraffe his fetuses conceived by a box of glue from Jewish Heritage that was made from marker sharpeners that fed paper to elephants while strumming a box of tissues to wipe up the mess from a box of chocolates Forest Gump feeds on your soul while a rock accidentally feeds a giraffe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops