They see me rolling' Up my sleeves for some volunteer work at the local shelter

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Terrorist jokes make me explode with laughter.

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What animal has four legs and one hand? Happy rottweiler

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I came home from my doctor`s appointment today, I told my sister that I was diagnosed with The Super rare "Spontaneous Erections Syndrome" (S.E.S) a very rare disease that can seriously impair the victims life in general, especially the social life, as symptoms may show themselves even among friends, pets, grandmas, enemies, and even close family! She told me that everybody knows I a just a kinky pervert with bulge so big it scared girls away instead of attracting them. Excuse me, what the hell is patient confidentiality good for if my doctor is going to call my sister and tell her everything she said to me afterwards?!

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Knock Knock Whos there? It was the unexpected arrival of his wifes lover who'd been having an affair with her for over a year She thought her husband would be out and forgot to tell him not to come The husband started breaking down in tears whilst throwing insults at both of them, grabbing the man by his collar and throwing him on the ground he started to kick his head in The man died and the husband and wife divorced, theres now a bench in the mans local park dedicated to him.

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How do you make an anti joke? You ask a question that could have a presumably amusing answer, but make the joke less amusing by stating an obvious answer, therefore completely bamboozling the victim of the anti joke, and making you seem like a man that has a lot of common sense.

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In that case you are probably a bit of an outcast as most girls of your beauty are, you know, you are that kind of girl that feels weird because when she got/gets on the buss EVERYONE stares at her, but nobody dares to say anything, right? And when you are hanging out for a drink or something guys stare at you, and go like "nah" which means "Nah she is too good to want me" and starts hitting on your friends instead. Oh and you also get a lot of rude comments from guys "auto disqualifying themselves" like using complements they know will backfire like "Hey wanna fuck sugart1ts? They do this so they can go home with their ego intact thinking "Hey I was tough enough to hit on her, but she turned out to be a bitch! So does any of this sound familiar?

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whats worse than 100 babies strapped to an atomic bomb? 1 baby strapped to 100 atomic bombs

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What do you call a midget on the moon? A midget.

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This comment has been removed for too many average votes.

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Why did the man paint his dog blue? He has some strange mental condition and is incapable of controlling his own actions.

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What's worse than a fly in your soup? Getting killed in a plane crash.

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A boy walks into a bar. Because he was under-age, security kicked him out as soon as possible and alerted his parents.

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Why did the man fall of his bike? He wasn't on his bike, i drowned him yesterday.

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Friends are like trees, They fall down if you hit them several times with an axe.

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What's harder than winning an argument with a woman. Lonsdaleite which has recently been declared the hardest substance known to man, and can withstand 58% more stress than the hardest diamond crystal.

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Poop

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Knock knock. Who’s there? Your son. Your son who? DAD WHY CAN’T YOU ACCEPT THE FACT THAT I AM GAY!

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Knock knock, Who's there The delivery man The delivery man who Just take this package

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why was the man walking in the kitchen? idk thats why i asked

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Why did the boy get stuck on the toilet? He was Elvis.

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Why did the chicken cross the road Time for you to get a watch

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Why does the man leave the store, with two lemons in his shopping bag? Because lemons happened to be one of the items of food he had purchased.

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YOU

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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