Potassium? K.

What do a fish and a frog have in common? They can both live in water. Its a well known fact.

How do you get a Hooker Wet? Dump her in a River.

What did the lone KKK member do when he passed 10 large, muscular black men in the street? He did not tell them that he was a member of the KKK.

What has 4 legs and cant walk? A paralyzed dog

What makes men cry? The realization that humanity is completely pointless in the infinitely expanding universe and thus any action to try and improve human life is also a complete farce.

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend "I know. You need to quit gnawing when you're giving me a blow job."

I hate it when I try to put my gun on safety but I accidentally shoot u a school full of kid.

What do bicycles and platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

-What do you call it when a female and male are together? - A very serious relationship.

What do grizzly bears and people have in common? Neither can survive in outer space, due to depressurization, lack of oxygen, and absence of basic survival needs.

some of the people who write thes jokes are complete assholes

A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

yo mama so fat that when she jumped on her tempurpedic mattress the wine did spill

What do you catch a baby with? A pitchfork

Question: How did the little girl die Answer: cancer and AIDS

Axel? Its Eliza, is that you? You alive again? I don't want to be no successor of anything, but thanks I guess. Neo-Nero has not shown up since you returned, I think he isn't very proud of himself and wont be a problem here on forward. He did push me aside, but now that you are alive, I wont even consider the thought of you "dying again" and unless you are dying or seriously ill, I don't want to hear anything about it. Seriously, how bad are you doing? Physically I mean? I am relieved, I mean we all thought you where dead.

What's woman spelled backwards? Sandwich-maker.

What's black and white and red all over. Half a zebra

Ginger woodpecker throbbing in the moonlight

whats the same about a spider and a grape? they both have eight legs, except for the grape.

I always like to pack a second pair of pants, because if there's one thing my mother ever said to me it was 'please, I'm begging you - don't put me in a home.'

What do you can an astronaut with an apple? Never mind, I have a boner.

What did the dancing amphibious landing craft say to the carrot faced caterpillar? wanna get in its cold

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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