oooh look a banshee

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what did the guy say before he went to kill the other guy? Im killing you

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A black guy and his black girlfriend are in a car. Who's driving? Their driver. The black guy has a very prosperous career and their life is at the envy of many.

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What did the man say to g**guy we are both g**

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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It was Valentines Day today, I thought I should get her something... I brought flowers to her grave.

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*Brother comes downstairs wet and naked* Mom: Did you enjoy your shower?

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If you saw two guys named Hambone and Flippy, which one would you think liked dolphins the most? I'd say Flippy, wouldn't you? You'd be wrong, though. It's Hambone.

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What do you get when lettuce and oranges come together? I dont know, thats why I asked you.

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Man is even more eager to copulate than a donkey – his purse is what restrains him

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How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? The same amount as white people, stop being racist.

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Why did the circus clown lose his balance? He had a seizure while on his unicycle, fell off, and bumped his head, leading to significant blunt trauma in the brain. Weeks later, after waking up from a coma, the doctors discover that he can no longer speak anything other than gibberish. His friends and family decide that he cannot go on living this way and decide to pull the plug.

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On a scale of 1 to Lord Voldemort, how awkward would you say your hugs are?

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What do you do after a murder kills your entire family? Nothing, he killed you too

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how does your hair keep changing lengths? due to my countless hours of grueling sessions in chemotherapy due to what was recently found as a terminal cancer, i wear wigs

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Knock knock. Who's there? Hatch. Hatch who? God bless you.

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Q: What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas. A: A bicycle.

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Why did Mark get paralyzed? Because he was a famed football player that went drafted for the 1st pick but was later hit so hard that his spine com pulsed and tore

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My Grandma has Alzheimers and always repeats what she says. My Grandma has Alzheimers and always repeats what she says. (Submitted by Aidan)

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What's sad about four black people going over in a cliff in Cadillac? It was my Cadillac.

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Q: What is a laptop that sings? A: A Dell

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What does the color 9 smell like? Purple, because aliens don't wear hats

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What did the fly say when he went to Dunkin Donuts? Can I have a doughnut?

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Humpty dumpty sat on a wall Humpty dumpty ha a great fall Hunpty dumpty's skull was split in two

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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