What happens when you leave Toby alone in your house? He eats your carpet, some pillows, ur dog, ned, neds dog and a glass panel. This is why 2 +h = plugger +Mount Everest (I is potato annoying). Bonjour.

Why did Moses part the sea Because it was divisible by 2

What's big and hairy my penis just kidding It's Bigfoot

What is the biggest lie in everyone's childhood? "School lunch food is actually good."

What do you call a fly without wings? A walk

An early jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

1.....2.....3.....boom you died

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

What's black, hairy, and full of hate? Hitler's moustache.

Why is the young Chinese boy crying? Because he is being raped.

There is no I in Pie except for the I

What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

*prepares this to get negative votes*

Your mom is so fat, that when she stepped on the scale she was disappointed with the number that appeared.

Why did the chicken cross the road? We don't know if he even did, how would we know why? There were no cameras at the intersection he crossed at. Therefor the question is unanswerable. Unless the chicken admits to it........ ........ Chickens can't talk.

What happened to the Mexican who commited suicide? He died.

What do you call a cow after an earthquake? Dead. The barn collapsed on top of it.

what's funnier than hell? heaven

What's worse than a dead baby? The corpse is chopped into little pieces And is put in a blender. Worse than that? An alive baby stuffed into a blender. Worse than that? Hellen Keller put into a blender. Worse than that? The holocaust.

Its easy they said, just type your text below they said, so I did

So there's a man named Moses. He prays to God for a donkey to transport him from Bethlahem to Jerusalem. God granted his wish. God said" To make the donkey go, you must say Hallelujah. To make it stop you say Go". Moses rode off happily. Suddenly the donkey went off trail and was headed towards a steep cliff. Moses kept saying stop, stop, stop. He remembered what God had said, and had said Go. They stopped one inch before falling down. Moses thanked the lord and said " Thank You Jesus, Hallelujah." And down they went.

What's green and smells like yellow paint? Green paint.

Who's Italian and plays with a peach? Mario

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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