What do you call an 8 year-old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why couldnt Julia find her cat? she has gone crazy from old age, her cat actually died 10 years ago

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why did the chicken cross the road?... it actually didn't

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what is red and lies on the floor? the boy that jumped out of the plane

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did no one throw a fridge at the boy on the swing? Because fridges are heavy.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's the difference between and elephant and a banana? An elephant is grey.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you do when your speeding and a cop is right behind you? make a complete stop and hope for the best

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is similar between women and puzzles? Neither had the right to vote before 1920. Puzzles still don't

thumb_up thumb_down +3

This is a haiku Haikus are not really jokes Congratulations!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I've had Alzheimer's for as long as I can remember... So since yesterday.... CHAYOTE ASTRONAUT SPACE SAY WHAT?!?!?!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the dog say to the other dog? Were both dogs!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

1: Knock knock. 2: Who's there? 1: Boo. 2: Please do come on in Boo, its so lovely to see you!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: Whats the biggest lie? A: The Cake...

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the African want for breakfast? Ebola cereal

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What happened as a result of the bitter terrorist attack? The president began to devise a plan to help the abused child

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? A: Depends on the size of the tub and the size of the babies.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry show me your tits!!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what has 2 legs and is red all over? Half a cat.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Fortunately," said the snooty maître d', "we'll let you come in without a Thai.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: How did the woman die in the black neighborhood? A: She suffered a fatal heart attack while visiting one of her friends. Everyone mourned their loss.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What would a prostitute do if she was given a million dollars? She would probably diversify her portfolio. First, she would pay her rent. She would buy some groceries and a present for her mother. She would then invest it in stocks and low-yield bonds. She would they buy a vehicle. This win might not affect her continuance in her job.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why did Samantha fall off the building? She was hit by a flying fridge dropped by a traffic helicopter.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Bannana man do do do do do ect.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the man buy fruits at the store? Because they were available, on sale, and the man was hungry, so he wanted to eat fruit at that time, he then got into his car, but thought to himself first, "I should unlock my car so I can open the door," so he does so, and sits in the drivers seat eating his fruit, he drives off to his home, arrives safely, and greets his family as he enters the house, then they sit down, eat dinner, and go to sleep, the next day, the man goes to the store, and buys vegetables

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops