What did the German say to the Jew? Sorry.

Who did you see last night? Nobody, no one wants to see you.

Yo mama's so fat, she's at risk for a number of obesity related disseases, including diabetes, hypertension, and heart dissease.

Isn't a coincidence that the signing of the Declaration of Independence and the 4th of July are on the same day? Weird

What color is the white cup? It's blue because it has two handles.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

Three politicians walk into a sports bar. Suddenly, everyone is watching the Stanley Cup playoffs.

What is more boring than watching paint dry? Aids

Jimmy and Ted are racing each other at the end ov the street. Jimmy is taller and thinner but Ted has more endurance. Who wins the race? A: the drunk driver

-What's the worst part about killing a baby? -Probably either recieving the death sentence or living psychologically scarred in prison for life.

I am aware that my positivity makes me do some bad mistakes, but if negativity is the alternative I will keep taking my chances.

Two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.-South Park

I don't think Holocaust jokes are funny, Anne Frankly I find them offensive.

Why did Lebron go to Miami? Because Chuck Norris told him to.

Two scuba divers are playing cards on the bottom of the ocean. One asks "have you got amy threes?" Then they both die from maintained exposure to the incredible pressure at the bottom of the sea. One left behind three children.

What's worse then forced to eat frog legs? Xbox one

What's funny about a man walking into a bar? He was a clown.

How many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? I don't know considering it was never done before, and that the size of the pancake would have to be taken into account. Although I would suggest you use a better material like wood, plastic, or metal.

The Kidder vs Bratman, not featuring Robbing the gay wonder: "MUHAHAhAha Bratman if you get me ill kill myself!" HOHOHOHO. "Uh okay" "I totally will!" "Go ahead" "I promise!" Bratman kills the Kidder as a favor, and no crime runs around Goodham city ever the end. Moral: Totally original nothing stolen from Joker and the Batman.

two cannables walk in to McDonalds

Why did the crocodile cross the road? It is actually highly improbable that such a large reptile would be in a residential area where such roads would exist.

what did the blond do after she turned 18? Reelected Obama.

Why was the bully in detention? He punched a fellow classmate.

What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? -A haircut

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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