What is worse than burning your toast? - Obama

What did the alien discuss with the other alien? Something we discussed.

What did the clerk say and do when he was givng out free food What he did:Gave them What he said:"If you want to get this free, pay $5.00"

when I shaved this morning....... hairs went down the sink

Q. What is the difference between a bird and a fly? A. A bird can fly, but a fly can't.

Q: What did your mom say to your dad? A: Honey i want a divorce.

What do you do when a bear chases you? Run.

What happens when you stick your finger in a pencil sharpener? Blood everywhere.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has Obsessive Complusive Disorder.

When life gives you skittles, throw them at random people and say "taste the freaking rainbow!"

why couldn't the little girl play on the swing? Matty Russel was chasing her

What's red and invisible? No Tomatoes

What has wings but is often on the ground? An aircraft that has frequent take-off problems.

Why don't white people do the right thing? Because we suck

When the black man was driving his car, why did he stop in front of the gun store? Because his car's velocity reached zero at that location.

What is it called when a black man does cocaine? A felony.

Why did the car slam its brakes on? There was a infant under the bonnet.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into another apple and finding another worm.

A: Knock knock B: Who’s there? A: The police B: The police who? A: Ma’am, your son is dead.

Me: Knock Knock, Pornstar: Cum in.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Hoo. Who Hoo? You're a barn owl!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he could beat the oncoming car.

What's green and fluffy? Red fluff, if you're color blind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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