A panda walks into a bar. He eats but then is tranquilized and taken back to the zoo.

What did the downsyndrome get for christmas? Aborted

What do you call a guy walking into a bar Dave, because that's his name

I have a dig bick . . . . . You have a dirty mind.

What's the difference between a Corvette and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Corvette in my garage.

whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? Pizza is not human, Jewish people are.

What's a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

whats the difference between ebola and a can of dead babies? i have ebola. this isnt funny at all.

Why wasn't the man able to see his son? He got run over by a train. Knock knock Who's there? The man. He was kidding about being run over.

What does Kim Kardashian and a Navy Vessel have in common? They are both full of seamen!

What do you call a kid with an eye-patch and a speech impediment? Names.

Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Several occupants leave as they realise the danger of the large animal.

Why did the condom drive over his pet mac and cheese? Because his uncle was not george bush.

roses are red violets are blue my poems mite be ugly and so are u

Every time you log on to a porn site, somewhere a panda cub explodes. BOYCOTT PORNOGRAPHY. SAVE THE PANDAS.

How do you make transportation in Harlem easier? Fix the roads and put in more stoplights.

Knock, knock. Who is there? Child services, here to take your children. The following day, there is another knock at the door. Who is there? The police. The woman runs into the kitchen and kills herself.

~Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was dead. ~ ~Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was stapled to the monkey!!!

once upon a time joey was on a roller coaster. Joey fell off the roller coaster and died.

i homeless man asked for ome change. he didnt get any because people were afraid he would spend it on drugs

What do you call a Chinese person with a computer for a head? Dead because it is impossible for your heart to function with out a brain

Why doesn't it rain on Sundays? It does.

What do you call a large group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

"Your invited!" "Invited to what?" "I can't tell but everybody you know." " He he."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...