Knock, Knock. Come in!

The Pope, Queen Elizabeth and a schoolboy are on a plane that is going to crash. It crashes and they all die instantly.

Why can't Helen Kellen drive? She's a woman.

How do you stop a train? You don't, unless your the conductor in which case you would hit the brake.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

What did Superman say when he forgot his cape? "Where's my cape?"

Guess what? I like trains.

how many times did lucy's mom drop her baby on its head? none, her mom died giving birth.....

A man says to a boy. I bet you I can jump over that mountain. The boy wins the bet because it is a physical impossibility to jump over a mountain.

How do five Jews get to America? They get their passports and ride a public plane, safely leaving the airport and getting on a taxi to go to their hotel.

What do you call kids born in whorehouses? Poor, poor children.

Knock Kock Who's there? Boo Boo who The ghost from Mario

roses are red violets are blue a pyschorapist just ate me refrigerator

A man was walking along and got his legs shot off. He then proceeded to calm his wife and children and buy a wheelchair.

Guy 1: Hey, do you like fish sticks? Guy2: Yeah. Guy 1: Me too

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

Two nineteenth century men walk into a bar. Their wives didn't complain, because if they did they'd get hit. hard.

A Rabbi walks into a bar. He payed for his drinks, tipped the bar tender, drank a few too many so he got a cab home.

Knock Knock Who's there? St. Judes St.Judes who ? St.Judes Research Hospital calling. Give me money, I've got cancer kids dying

A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

What's black and hangs from a tree? A bat.

there's a blonde and a brunette jumping out of a plane, what one hits the ground first? they both hit at the same time because gravity pulls everything down towards the earth at the same pace

Q: What's worse than getting jury duty? A: Getting herpies from a rabbit

Q. Why do Italian men have mustaches? A. So they can look like their mothers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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