What do you call a smart blond? There aren't any so there shouldn't be a name for it.

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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What's worse than slipping on a bannana peel? The Gestapo. Go to Aushwitz now.

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What is the difference between a black man and a speed bump? A black man is a living thing and a speed bump is not.

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How do you make a mime cry? Hit him with an axe

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side (The original AntiJoke)

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what did the anorexic girl eat today? nothing..

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Q: why did everyone on the ship drown? A: Because the ship sunk

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wommmoaooammaaa

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Man 1:Doctor Doctor, I've got 59 seconds to live! Man 2: This is a chemist

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Whats funnier than 2 dead babies? Seinfeld, and I hate Seinfeld.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar. The three of them discuss theology for quite some time and then begin approach various patrons with invites to attend their respective Sunday services.

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There was an american man on the way to work.

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Knock knock Who's there? You Whoa...

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why did the asian kid do well on his math test because he studied

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If Johnny can hold 7 bottles of Vodka in one hand and 6 cans of beer in the other, what does Johnny have? A drinking problem.

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why did the boy have no friends? cause he was smelly

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Knock Knock Who's There? The police- we are sorry to inform you that your wife and only child was killed in a brutal car accident earlier this evening, We offer our condolences.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What do you call a Muslim in control of a plane? A pilot

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What's worse than getting a fly stuck up your nose? Been alone in a hospital room with Jimmy Saville.

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-Hey I know something funnier than 24, ---What? -25! Hey I know something funnier than 25. ---What? -The Holocaust!

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Two men walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have some H2O!" The second man says "I'll have some H2O too!" Both men get water, because the bartender knows better than to give someone dihydrogen dioxide.

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Nero, thank you for this opportunity, I desire to join the shadows, I left a thumbs up. Michelle

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops