What's black, white, and red all over A penguin in a blender

Q: What kind of bees make milk? A: None. Bees make honey, not milk.

Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

What do you call a smart blond? There aren't any so there shouldn't be a name for it.

Roses are red Violets are blue, I am sorry... But you have terminal cancer and are probably going to die in about 3 months

what do you call a blonde with black hair? Artificial intelligence

What was Steve Jobs' favorite fruit? Grapes.

What did the old man catch at a baseball game? Aids.

What did the cat say to the dog? Meow

What happened to the deaf, dumb, and blind kid? I don't know. Niether does he.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side (The original AntiJoke)

What's worse than slipping on a bannana peel? The Gestapo. Go to Aushwitz now.

How do you make a mime cry? Hit him with an axe

What is the difference between a black man and a speed bump? A black man is a living thing and a speed bump is not.

what did the anorexic girl eat today? nothing..

Man 1:Doctor Doctor, I've got 59 seconds to live! Man 2: This is a chemist

Whats funnier than 2 dead babies? Seinfeld, and I hate Seinfeld.

wommmoaooammaaa

If Johnny can hold 7 bottles of Vodka in one hand and 6 cans of beer in the other, what does Johnny have? A drinking problem.

why did the boy have no friends? cause he was smelly

There was an american man on the way to work.

Knock knock Who's there? You Whoa...

why did the asian kid do well on his math test because he studied

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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