A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

A green-painted man walked into a bar and confused a blonde, bar-tending horse with a tale of rape in the holocaust involving an amputee child riding a fridge on a plane with a pig, a duck, a chicken, a lawyer and countless men of various ethnicities, religious faiths and sexual persuasions. Together, they changed a lightbulb, ate wormy apples and agreed upon the colour of roses and violets respectively.

how big is the moon? why the hell are you asking me?...dumbass.

why did the little girl fall off the swing she had no arms

Two men walk into a bar. The first man says, "I'm Japanese!" The second man says, "I'm Japanese too!" The bartender says, "I'm also Japanese!" The bar was in Japan.

Why did the man buy fruits at the store? Because they were available, on sale, and the man was hungry, so he wanted to eat fruit at that time, he then got into his car, but thought to himself first, "I should unlock my car so I can open the door," so he does so, and sits in the drivers seat eating his fruit, he drives off to his home, arrives safely, and greets his family as he enters the house, then they sit down, eat dinner, and go to sleep, the next day, the man goes to the store, and buys vegetables

Yo momma so fat,she went on a diet and now exersizes regularly

What happened when the mailman shot the plumber? The plumber died.

Knock Knock? Who's there? How did you know it was me?

Knock knock. Who's there? Robert. Robert who? Robert Anderson.

how do you kill Lady Gaga? with a gun.

The indistinguishable bug corrupts a bond arrow.

Why was the man's foot hot? Because it was stuck in a toaster.

what did the super popular, beautiful girl say to her stalker? i dont know, i wasnt the stalker.

When will racism end? When everyone's dead.

what is the difference between 10 and 3 7

We have come to the United States in search of a just, and profitable land, but we have found a place of bigots and racists.

this is not a drill.

what happened when the chicken crossed the road? it got ran over by a car recently after it go killed it was eaten by a hobo and the hobo died from ring worm

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

Q: Why did Frank have a big horse named Bubba? A: He was allergic to cats

What would Steve Jobs be doing today if he were alive? Dying.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? There aren't pineapples in the ocean.

Im Black And I Will Beat You Children At Checkers,They Can Be Red

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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