What's the difference between an orange? The horse because the vest has no sleeves.

Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

Last Christmas I gave you my pie but the very next day you put it in your tummay. Now your dead because I poisoned the pie.

What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

what did Sandra bullock say to Jesse James? I hate your fickin a**!!:)

a horse nibbled a baby

what do you call a blonde with black hair? Artificial intelligence

[Insert hurtful, yet spontaneous comment here.]

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? Physical abuse.

the love boat

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, your wife and kids die.

Why did the black guy scream? well, he just saw his friend get shot, and there was blood everywhere.

Knock knock Who's there? A robber Oh

fava beans

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

Your mom is so fat that she enjoys junk food regularly.

What did the comedian tell the audience? A well thought out joke that anyone can relate to because that is what the point of a joke is.

how do you make old people hate eachother? put them in a night time psychology class

My computer crashed today I was watching porn.

when i go to a nude beach people think im looking for lost jewelery and treasure

Evolution is real. Why? Pikachu evolves.

If a tree falls down in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does God exist?

A man comes home from work and finds his wife in bed with his next-door neighbor. Furious, he shouts 'What's the meaning of this?!' And his wife answers 'A pronoun used to identify a specific person or thing close at hand or being indicated or experienced'.

Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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