What did dick Cheney say to his friend that he accidentally shot in the face while quail hunting? Sorry for shooting you in the face

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-Will you follow the live coverage of 86th Acacemy Awards? -No. -Are you anti-semitic?

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Daddy look! Roses! No son, those are rhododendrons... Daddy how do you spell rhododendrons? Uh... never mind son those are roses. So... Daddy how do you spell roses? Son, never mind that is a dog. So daddy how do you spell... SHUT UP! Moral: I put a spell on you.

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A man asks a young woman at a party if a rag smells like chloroform. She doesn't respond because she's passed out. He takes her to a nearby bedroom, rapes her, and leaves the party promptly. He'll probably victimize many other women with this method.

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I just witnessed a horrible accident today! It was like a silent movie, but with SOUND!!!!

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Want to know whats funnier than 24? 25

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What's black & sits at the top of the staircase? A quadriplegic after a house fire.

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There was a black and white spotted dog named Louis. Why did they call her that? Because, that's what they named her.

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why couldnt the kid get off the couch when his mom asked him to? he was paralyzed

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How many people does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, more people would just make it harder.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "I'm your dog. Please stop having sex with me on Chatubate."

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Joker: say knock knock. Person: knock knock Joker: Who's there?

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Roses are red, Violets are violet.

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Why was the man sad? His intestines were imploding and his head was shot off seventeen seconds ago.

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"knock knock" "whos there" "poop" "poop who" "poop in the toilet"

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Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Your neighbor

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What is it worse than a bee sting ? -Two bee stings What 's worse than two bee stings ? -The holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust ? -3 bee stings

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What did the blind, deaf orphan get for Easter? Hepatitis.

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A Black and a Mexican are in the back of a car, they are carpooling to save money on gas.

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giddy goat

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So 3 Jews walk into a bar, I lied, it was a gas chamber.

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im a willy bum bum

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hot diggity dog

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Knock Knock Who's There Your doctor... You have Aids

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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