Why did little Sally drop her ice cream? She got ran over by the school bus

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the little boy run away from the beach? Hurricane Irene.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Is your plant made out of Osmium, Molybdenum, Silicon and Sulfur? Because it's going through OsMoSiS. That was just a joke, not a pick up line. Unless I was giving a pick-up line to your plant, which I definitely wasn't...

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Person 1:why did the person fart Person 2: wh.... Person 1:shut up I'm not interested any more! Btw person 2 got interrupted

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Yo mama so fat, she should see a doctor to discuss healthier lifestyles.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Yo momma is so fat that her cholesterol level is above 240 mg/dL and should highly consider a vegan diet if she wishes to improve.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q: What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench A: The NBA

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did Colussi miss 2 years of school? -Because he died

thumb_up thumb_down -22

knock knock come in!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did one volcano say to the other? Hey.... wana get some lunch... later, not now of course it's WAAAAY TOO EARLY!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q: How do you solve a problem like Maria. A: You kill her. You kill Maria.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A married couple is arguing over the temperature in their house. The wife wants it at 62 degrees and the husband wants it at 74. What should they do? Nothing while they are arguing their daughter decides to put it at 32 and freeze them to death

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call a person trying to rob a store with no arms? Peter Pan

thumb_up thumb_down -22

a duck walks in to a gay bar and asks for a stick they asked where he wanted it before he could answer he was rapped

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Worlds first anti joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call Bilbo Baggins when you use him for pleasure? Dildo Baggins

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did billy have a bruse? Because he got smacked with a belt. -Louis

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you get when you cross a rusty nail and a foot? Tetanus

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What does samios search on google? Shemale gey big t.it lactating big c.ock An.al tearing Ana.l dilation school girl rape compilation

thumb_up thumb_down -24

I don't know what was a bigger disappointment, the series finale of "Lost" or--sorry I thought I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A man walks into a bar. He sees two horses, and about 15 other men in there which seem to have their own ethnicity and religion preferences. About 20 people on the sidelines were on anti-joke.com, writing down these jokes. About two leave at the same time, noticing that there is a horse in the bar. The man goes outside. Five swingsets are right next to each other, and some kids with no arms or no legs cannot swing. They are also being called names. An old adult is climbing a telephone pole with a backpack full of bananas. Also, a boy drops his ice cream after getting hit by a bus. And at the same time, he notices that most of these are better than the holocaust. He thinks, "do I live in Crazytown?" Well, he does.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Want to hear a joke? Me neither.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

what do you call a man with no arms or legs sitting at your doorstep? matt what do you call a man with no arms or legs floating in the water? bob what do you call a man that just had his daughter taken away from him? ...sam

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops