why did the chicken cross the road it was being chased by the man from the chicken slaughter house.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was holding hands with the first. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It saw a banana. Why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? It slipped. Why did the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? It thought this was all a game. Why did the sixth monkey commit suicide? All his friends were gone.

Why didnt little jimmy have a funeral? Because he is still at the bottom of the lake where I put him.

An overzealous adventurer takes a trip to the Congo in Central Africa. While exploring the dense jungles, he accidentally drinks water that is contaminated with a very rare virus. He lives through the pain of the virus for many years. About 10 years after his trip to Africa, researchers discover a cure for the adventurer's virus. He goes to the clinic to get his shot to kill the virus. Exhilarated, the now cured adventurer runs out of the clinic but fails to look both ways while crossing the street and gets hit by and ambulance and dies.

Why did the blonde turn red Because some one lit her on fire

Why did the baby die, because he got herpes, so did his mother, there both dead now.

What's hard and orange on the outside, and squidgy in the middle? A tanned man's head

Q: you know whats a good movie? A: twilight.

Question: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Answer: Being raped by a giant scorpion.

If humans say YOLO what do cats say? meow.

what has 2 legs and bleeds alot half a dog

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? The baby is not a car.

What do you call a man bathing with a toaster Electrocuted

what's the difference between a box of dead babies and a corvette? I don't have a corvette in my garage!

Why can't vampires go out in the sun? Becuase they don't exist.

whats fat and ugly ? aidan slattery

Johnny Depp is Alexander Graham the whole time.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Oh, they were just nailing a notice of foreclosure to the door.

How do you punish Helen Keller? Send her to her room until she becomes civil enough to explain what was causing her misbehavior.

What do you call a black man on your front porch? -Racism is a serious and non humorous problem.

you: "hey, is your refrigerater running?" random, confusded individual: "yeah" you: "oh."

Q:Whats worst then finding a worm in your apple? A:Getting raped in the ass.

a dog ate my homework but then he returned it on the lawn

Why did the black man approach a small white girl in the alley? He was knew in town and needed directions

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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