What did batman say to robin before getting into the bat mobile? Don't touch my penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

An unarmed man robbed a bank today, he failed because he had no way of carrying the cash out.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

poop nuff said

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Roses are Red Violets are Blue No they're not They're purple

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What do you call 10 Asians playing basketball? A group of friends hanging out and having a good time.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Q: What is George Harrison's favorite hairstyle? A: How can we know? He's dead!

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What's the difference between basketball and an elephant? One's a sport and one's a large African animal.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

How come the blind black guy couldent read because he is dead

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What's worse than biting into a worm and finding an apple? Why would you bite into a worm?

thumb_up thumb_down +41

People say the sky's the limit................................ but there's footprints on the moon.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

An Atheist and a Christian are walking along a sidewalk going in opposite directions when suddenly the Atheist sneezes. The Christian says "God Bless You!" Even though the Atheist doesn't believe in God he understand that the gesture was a kind one and so he nods and politely says "Thank you!" before going on about his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Superman, Batman and Spiderman are all in a race. Who wins? Grow up. Superheros aren't real.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

what is a bike without wheels? not a bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Your momma's so fat: She feels excluded by mainstream clothing outlets.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What did the woman say to her rapist? I've had better.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why was the little kid sad at a funeral. He was actually happy and he was at six flags

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Pizza guy. Just a minute, I have to grab my wallet.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Yo momma is so ugly, that your father can no longer stand her. They are getting divorced.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

How do you upset an Mexican? Kill his entire family.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Two cannibals were eating a man, one at the top and one at the bottom. The cannibal at the top said, "are you having fun down there?" The cannibal at the bottom said, "yeah, I'm having a ball!"

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why couldn't the colorblind boy play Twister with his friends? He was a quadriplegic.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did the mime say to the girl? .......

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A black man walks into an abbatoir.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops