I hate it when i don't forward an email and then i die the next day.

What is the main similarity of Darth Vader and Michael Jackson? They are both dead fathers.

On a plane directed to Buffalo there are: an italian, a french and a greek. They all go there for tourism

Why can't humans fly? Because there is simply no natural way of achieving lift with the bodies that we have. We must use other means to become airborne such as planes and hot air balloons.

Why did Doris have no control over her bladder? Because she was old and suffered catastrophic incontinence

Why did the man with no arms, and no legs knock on your door? He can't, he has no arms!

If frogs weren't alive, there wouldn't be any frogs left on earth.

What is worse than burning your toast? - Obama

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender

Why is six afraid of seven? Cuz the chicken crossed the road

What do you do when you see a mentally challenged kid in a wheelchair? Walk up and offer to push him, as you should since he probably hasn't had a lot of friends in his lifetime.

How do you make a baby cry? Break its legs.

Women's Rights.

A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "With proper medical attention and rest, yes, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

i like serious. serious means business. business means cash. cash means money. money makes me happy and when i'm happy you dont die

There once was a man from Nantucket.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am colourblind so screw you!

Why was Tom flunking in school? He had a learning disability.

Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

How many eco-friendly people does it take to change a lightbulb? Nobody knows because fluorescent lightbulbs last 6 to 12 years longer than an incandescent lightbulb.

Well, as you know, I have alzheimers and... ... ... ... ... ... Well, as you know, I have alzheimers.

Knock knock Who's there? I'm the Dick I'm the dick who? I'm the Dick Cheney

I was sitting in traffic the other day. I got ran over

Yo mamma's so fat, she died of diabeties and we all mourn her loss.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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