A small plane is flying across the Atlantic Ocean, on board there's a Black Guy, a Jew, a Priest, and a Mexican. The plane has engine failure and needs to crash, but luckily there are enough parachutes for everyone. The evacuation is succesful.

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What should you do when a man carrying a stuffed tortoise tries to break into your house? Call the police.

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What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was black

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A Mexican walked into a bar. He never came back out.

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What is blue and angry? Mr Johnston wearing his green dress. I'm colour blind but he came round to my way of thinking in the end.

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What do you call a puppy in alaska? A cold PUPPY!!!!!

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Why was there a black man and a white man in a bar? Due to the probability of this occurance happening due to percentages of black/white people in a bar, this specific situation should be of no shock, in fact it is a completely normal occurance one of which should not be questioned

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Ask me if I'm a kangaroo Are you a Kangaroo? No….

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Where do you go when your friends called you spoiled? Africa.

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You know what's really funny? Cancer What's funnier than that? The Holocaust Even funnier? Charlie Sheen

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Rebecca Black starts to sing a song, and when breaking out into her annoying chorus, we realize that it's not about the days of the week.

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just a man and his thoughts....and a smart phone app, and a loving family, thats not the point.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interrupting Cow who? Interrupting Cow who, unlike his quiet friends back on the farm, enjoys to speak when others are nearly finished with their sentence.

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Priest: "Matt, will you take Senae to be your wife, your partner in life and your one true love? Will you cherish her friendship and love her today, tomorrow and forever? Will you trust and honor her, laugh with her and cry with her? Will you be faithful through good times and bad, in sickness and in health as long as you both shall live?" Matt: No

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Wife says to husband, who works is programmer, "Honey get out of bed there is a bug in the bed". Husband says "ok."

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Elizabeth Warren

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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How do you save a black man from drowning? I don't know GOOD!

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What nickname do you give Harrison Kinney if he is good at remixing music? Harrison "Remix" Kinney

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What was big and stiff A 30cm ruler

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So, today I was walking down the street... I met a black guy.

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How do you confuse a blond? Dress up as Lady Gaga and yell "Ni!" in her face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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