Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. The police who? The POLICE, now open the god damn door!

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What do you have if you have 100 rabbits in a row and 99 step back? That would be a very unlikely thing to happen, unless a mildly scary predator was released in front of them, or they weren't all stepping back at the same time.

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John: Spell IT Mike: Q-U-A-D-R-A-M-E-C-H-A-N-I-C-S

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Adam Turkolowoskiaklfadjufsdjksbgsgsafafdsg

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn’t get to cross the road. Halfway through the crossing, it was hit by a car and turned into roadkill. Then a family of black people picked it up and turned it into fried chicken.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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Why did the lights turn off? Because I turned them off.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Me: Ask me if in a giraffe You: Are you a giraffe Me: no

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Roses are red Here is something new Violets are violet NOT FUCKING BLUE

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Q: What's the difference between a Chicken and a Triceratops? A: One is a Chicken and One is a Triceratops.

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I told my wife she was like a fine wine She asked if it was because she improves with age. I told her yes All was well.

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How do you fit 10 dead babies in a bowl? A blender How do you get them out? Chips

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Q: What did Yoda do at the end of star wars when he lost his light saber? A: He asked the prop guy if he had any more and he happened to have another and they went on with making the great film many still love today.

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Why was the Cubs fan sad? His wife just left him.

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216-409-7176 Call me.

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Q )Why did the black man shoot the white man? A )The black man had been walking home from his weekly gospel service at the local church when suddenly the criminal had stopped him in his tracks. In a desperate attempt to save himself he seized the gun from the white man and shot him in the leg in order to defend himself. He survived.

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Q: Why did the boy fall off his bike? A: Someone threw a refridgerator at his head.

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Why did Justin Beiber fall out of a plane? Because i pushed him off

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Queens Park rangers

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What does a nun and a hat have in common? Size

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destiny

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I really don't like Holocaust jokes. My grandfather died in the Holocaust. He fell off of a guard tower.

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Roses are red. Violets are black. Why is your chest, As flat as my back?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops