I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! Win a few Lose a few I'm Donald Trump!

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Q: whats big gray and cant swim A: a castle

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The day the forces of light fight the forces of darkness, we will all live in darkness no matter who wins. Pure darkness will not allow you to see. Pure light will blind you.

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Boy: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're accent sure sounds like it.

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Why did Juan cross the border into America? To provide a better opportunity for him and his family.

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Scott Gomez

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Hey, does this smell like chloroform to you?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt, the chicken is dead.

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What happens when you give a Jew an iPhone? He says thank you and gives you a hug.

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In this case, its black operations, but simply in the term that its a well secret something, its not a lets say, organization that breaks the law, kidnaps listens to phones uses wires, which the FBI does. And when I mean I am a employee, I might have spoken a bit over my head here (sorry, lightheaded), you could well, simply put, I am something between a delivery boy and a mercenary, not the kind that shoots and kills (my shape sucks anyways), but rather the kind that "facilitates" communications between organizations... Thats all I can say without breaking laws that technically do not exist.

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What's worse than farting in a silent class room? Denying it and farting a second time.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because that's where all of the other chickens are.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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antonio is ssooo shexy and smokes

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What did the Carbon atom say to the Oxygen atom? Nothing, basic elements are incapable of speech. It requires a culmination of many atoms to form a living human capable of speaking to another human.

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Q.why did the woman die A.she left the refrigerator door open then left the kitchen

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You Obviously Lack Originiality YOLO.

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Hey, look over there! It's ur mom!

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A man with no arms and no legs

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side

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What's better than fornicating two 4 year old twins? Killing their parents in front of them before you do.

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What's the main difference between dogs and children? When children reach their teen years they grow up and leave home. When dogs reach their teen years they die of old age.

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What do you get when you cross drugs with a bathtub? Whitney Houston's worst nightmare

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He walked in a bar

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops