Here's a joke, a black man walks into a store and buys something. that's it.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a Chinese person with a computer for a head? Dead because it is impossible for your heart to function with out a brain

thumb_up thumb_down +8

The anti joke that repeats itself :(

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's black and white and red all over. Half a zebra

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Your mom is so poor, she can't afford nice clothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down +8

One night I went to this pub, they had a big jar full of $10 notes in top of the bar. I asked the bar tender what was that jar for and he told me that they have a donkey around back and if you make it laugh you win the jar. So i went around the back and i come back around 5 mins later and the donkey was laughing its head off. So i grabbed the jar and told the boys lets hit the clubs.Two weeks later i went to the same pub and they had another jar with $10 notesso i asked the bar tender what that jar was for and he goes to me "that donkey has been laughing ever since you left, now we want the donkey to cry" So I asked for a go and went around the back and when i come back the donkey was crying. as i went to go grab my jar but the bar tender stops and asks me how i did it. the first time i came i told the donkey i had a bigger dick then him.. the 2nd time i showed him.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock knock Who's there Ted Bundy

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What makes men cry? The realization that humanity is completely pointless in the infinitely expanding universe and thus any action to try and improve human life is also a complete farce.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How many licks does it take to get to center of a tootsie pop? pickles, 7:00 pm, wood, shoulder pain

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was the blonde girl stupid? She had suffered sever brain damage the previous month and was still recovering.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you get a Hooker Wet? Dump her in a River.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Having your entire family killed in a car accident

thumb_up thumb_down +8

96

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Ask me if I'm a toaster Are you a toaster? No, I'm a tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Potassium? K.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats the worst part of your school burning down? A: The burnt pizza.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

If the blue man lives in the blue house, the red man lives in the red house and the green man lives in the green house, where does the orange man live? In the orange house.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

The original Moral Man has left Horsehead network, but I will keep monitoring this section for like 3 hours... Then probably never again on this shit site it barely works ffs! Moral: "Turn every stone, and you might find a penny, turn every penny and you might find a stone that stone is in our shoe, kick it away, crush it, destroy it"

thumb_up thumb_down +8

a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse replies "my wife died yesterday." the next day the bartender wakes up and realises that it didn't happen and that he is a drunk asshole with no life.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's hard, long and full of seamen? an erect penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Xbox One

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the homicidal maniac say to his 13th victim? Nothing, she was dead at the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops