What's the difference between a black man and a bench? A bench is an inanimate object.

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What's 8 inches long and makes my girlfriend cry when I put it in her mouth? Her miscarriage

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A middle-aged white woman is walking toward a building, talking on her cellphone to a friend. She says, "Yes, I can meet you for lunch in a few hours. I have to go to the unemployment office to sign up for benefits. It's going to be horrible. It'll probably be full of black people." Standing in line, she is incredibly uncomfortable and horrified, because there is a black man right behind her, and she is stuck standing next to him for a long time. Finally it's her turn, and she steps up to the counter. The clerk asks her, "And what did you do for a living?" She answers, "I mopped the floors and cleaned the bathroom in a Blockbuster store that closed down." The clerk says, "Fill out this paperwork and take it to window #2." As she turns around, she is once more repulsed by the black man who is standing right there. Now that it's his turn, he steps to the counter, and the clerk asks him, "And what did you do for a living?" He answers, "I was the senior vice president of global strategic development for Eastman Kodak."

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Uh, summa lumma dooma lumma you assuming I'm a human What I gotta do to get it through to you I'm superhuman Innovative and I'm made of rubber, so that anything you say is Ricochet in off a me and it'll glue to you And I'm devastating more than ever demonstrating How to give a motherfuckin' audience a feeling like it's levitating Never fading, and I know that haters are forever waiting For the day that they can say I fell off, they'll be celebrating 'Cause I know the way to get 'em motivated

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Q: Why did the koala fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

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What did the doctor say to the young boy? We only planned on a annual checkup but have discovered that your and aids baby and only have 3 days to live. Tell your family members goodbye you'll be on life support in the next couple hours.

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I STUCK MY TESTICLE IN A BLENDER!!!

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Z.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Poetry is hard And so is wood

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Q:What do African American men call the Internet? A:The Internet

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Do you know whats sad? Global Warming Do you know why the polar bears are dying? Aids

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at it's face.

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I didn't choose the thug life... I got a job.

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How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? 1

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Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? Well, he's dead.

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Why was the Asian guy dumped by his hot girlfriend? Well you know what they say about Asian guys.... They are too dedicated to their schoolwork.

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When is Florida not the sunshine state? At night.

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How many morman minutes does it take to get to school? A lightyear

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so i was F***in this guy the other day with my penis.....shit! i mean i was F***in this girl and i jizzed

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a girl had just gotten dumped by her boyfriend over a text message. she got very sad and became suicidal

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guess wat chicken butt guess why chicken thy guess who chicken poo guess how he chickened out

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Why can't Helen Kellen drive? She's a woman.

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What's a pirates favorite element the periodic table? Gold.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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