Santa Clause, a smart blonde, and the Queen of England all jump out of a plane, which hits the ground first? Galileo's theory tells us that all objects fall at the same speed regardless of weight, so they all hit simultaneously.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? Well neither has he.

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why did the kid fall down the stairs? he had polio

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What do u call two mexicans playing basketball? Juan on Juan!

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Where did Susie go when the bomb went of? Everywhere?

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knock knock who's there? to to who? to whom*

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Why is a budgie Because the other leg is yellow

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what do u call a apple a apple

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch

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Knock Knock Whos there? It was the unexpected arrival of his wifes lover who'd been having an affair with her for over a year She thought her husband would be out and forgot to tell him not to come The husband started breaking down in tears whilst throwing insults at both of them, grabbing the man by his collar and throwing him on the ground he started to kick his head in The man died and the husband and wife divorced, theres now a bench in the mans local park dedicated to him.

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So I was blow drying my penis and my girlfriend asked what I was doing. Apparently, "heating up your dinner." wasn't the right response.

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I have the answer to why the child stepped on a ball-he was dumb

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What did the Fish say to the other Fish? Nothing, fish cant talk.

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If your uncle jack helped you off your horse, would you help your uncle jack off a horse? Yes

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Why did the italian go to jail? because he had just robbed a bank and then brutally murdered his wife and kids.

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When is a door not a door? When your burns down.

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What hurts worse than a papercut? Divorce.

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What does it mean if you have 5$ and Chuck Norris has 5$? Congrats! You both have five dollars!

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What's funnier than a dead baby? An episode of 'Friends'.

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did u here bout the guy who found 500 dollars on the ground? yup he is 500 dollars richer

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What's the differences between oranges? Trees don't have doors.

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Why did the white guy sit on the bench while the black guys were playing basketball? His mother was calling, and his AP scores were coming in that day. Those scores were important to him.

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whats worst than school? the earth exploding whats worse than the earth exploding? the sun exploding whats worse than the sun exploding? 10,000 suns exploding

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Whats Black and White and Red all over ? A Zebra laying in a pool of its own blood.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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