why cant monkeys swim? cause they dont have staberlizers.

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http://richardfigures.com/

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roses are red and have big balls woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

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How do you hold someone in suspense?

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Why was the women's underwear red?... Because she got stabbed.

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How does a pirate get to work? His CAAAARRRR! Where does the pirate go after work? The BAAAARRRR! How does the pirate get home from the bar? A taxi. A pirate doesn't drive after consuming alcohol.

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i lost the game

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He walked in a bar

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Rishi is a funny guy, well he thinks he is. true story.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers who are you?

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5

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Jenny tried out for the school play. She got a callback the next day. Her father had died.

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Q. How many babies does it take to paint a room? A. Depends on how hard you throw them.

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One day a mans computer was unusually, when all else failed, he had to go to extreme measures. He then refreshed his page.

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If only i were a man! You not! Your a.... WO-MAN!

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what did the mushroom say to the other mushroom? nothing, mushrooms can't talk

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Why did Billy drop his ice-cream? He got stabbed multiple times

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why did michael jackson write black or white he didnt want black people to copy him

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We just got a letter We just got a letter We just got a letter I wonder who it's from Oh look, it's a letter from our friends If there is a place you got to go I am the one you need to know I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! If there is a place you got to get I can get you there I bet I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 ate 2,091,029,203,284,485,389,684,564,345,089,859,849,485,374,094,394,584,584.00002394832323945834958349234854343432323343534342323243543534234358394564023285409564053942304923049234 x 10 to the 1234543565342312323560845834034th power divided by 0.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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roses are red violets are blue i'm not a? poet microwave

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Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Your doorbell is broken.

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what's the best way to eat a dead baby? stewed into chili with jalepeno cheddar corn bread on the side

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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