How do you get rid of an STD? You give it to someone else.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

So I'm at the office and I tell this guy, "Hey can you pass me the stapler. But when you pass it over, make sure there are staples in it 'cause if not, I can't staple anything."

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's black and has a beary taste? A black bear.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's better than winning the paraplegic Olympics? Walking.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How does a black man put puzzles together? First, he locates the four corners. Next, he begins filling in the sides. Finally, he uses the picture on the box to fill in the center. It can be a very tedious process if he is not paying attention.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Because she has down's syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Yo mamma is so pretty, she is frequently complimented on her good looks.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why didn't the Alzheimers patient put on her shoes? She didn't leave the elderly home that day, thus taking away the need to put on shoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

whats better than an anti joke? a joke that you find funyer than an anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down +8

The anti joke that repeats itself :(

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was Shane cool... Because he was a cool bean.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

roses are red, violets are blue.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

how did I get in your moms pants. I ripped them off.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

roses are red violets are blue just telling you in case you didnt know

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Guess what? What? Idk. I just wanted to make u excited.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Two blondes walk into a bar. You'd have thought one of them would have seen it.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Ask me if I'm a toaster Are you a toaster? No, I'm a tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What walks on four in the morning, three at noon, and two at night? A baby with leprosy.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you get when you put the head of a lion on the body of an eagle?2 dead animals and a fine for killing protected species.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call Batman with a knife in his chest? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Hi

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you do if you can't go to the Wednesday Night Market on Wednesday? You go on Thursday

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops