What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? "Men, get on the ship."

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What's 7+7? 14 you dumbass

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What's the difference between Jackie Chan and Bruce Lee? Bruce Lee's dead.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no human can.

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Word play, punch-line, joke.

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What did the picture say to the man? Don't frame me

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid get on his birthday? Cancer.

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What does Megatron say when a video game takes forever to load? "You have failed me yet again, Start Screen!"

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Roses are red Violets are blue Last night I came home to find my entire family murdered....

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into another apple and finding another worm.

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If life gives you lemons, give them back. They were probably stolen, and even if they weren't, lemons are a pretty shitty gift to give someone.

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What do you call a Black pilot? A pilot! What else would you call him, racist!

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Yo mama is so fat, so when she jumped of a building, she died.

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Your mother is so ugly that when she looks in the mirror she feels bad about her appearance.

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A man walks into a bar. He had to leave promptly because he, according to the law, was too young to be served alcohol.

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If frogs weren't alive, there wouldn't be any frogs left on earth.

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What's green and fluffy? Red fluff, if you're color blind.

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What was the reason for the confused looking woman staring at the can of frozen Apple juice for twenty minutes? Some cans are difficult to open: The little ring bit comes off when you pull it, and then you have to work out a new way to open it, which takes patience and ingenuity.

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How do you spell dog? C-A-T!

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Whats the difference between an oven and a Jew? An oven is a manufactured and creates heat through the power of electricity or natural gas

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What do you call a gardener in Mexico? Un Jardinero.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am colourblind so screw you!

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What has wings but is often on the ground? An aircraft that has frequent take-off problems.

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How many Jews died in the Holocaust? Not enough.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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