Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no human can.

Whats 1+1? Well,According to John Willemain's Business Analysis: Problem Solving Using Calculus and Finite Mathematics it's 2.

What's red and round? A red and round solid.

What happens when you throw a penny between two Jewish men? Probably nothing, but one of them might pick it up and ask if you have dropped a penny.

How many ants does it take to fill an apartment? It depends on the size of the apartment.

How can you tell when a lawyer is lying? In most people who lie eyebrows may raise, eyes may widen and gaze may alter, anal sphincter usually tightens, breathing often quickens marginally, external body temperature alters and sweat (and therefore skin electrical conductivity) increases.

black people. that is all...

A woman comes to the doctor with a dog and the doctor says: -What are you doing here, dog? Get the hell out of here, you're an animal.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

The Olympics

Tyler: Hey, James if you were a cavemen you would die. James: Why? Tyler: Because everybody hates you.

What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

A man walks into a barn the n was not visible

Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

a black man jumps in a pool.

Q Why is an octopus like a tree? A Haven't the foggiest.

How are you this morning?

Whats the difference between an oven and a Jew? An oven is a manufactured and creates heat through the power of electricity or natural gas

So this one time at band camp... a flute gave me an STD.

Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

What's bigger than your penis? The Empire State Building.

A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they got married and lived happy together for the rest of their lifes.

What do you call a gardener in Mexico? Un Jardinero.

What's green and falls fom a tree? A dump truck. I lied about it being green.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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