The eighties called They were pretty exited about inventing a telephone that can call the future

Q: What do sleeping pills and coffee have in common? A: Absolutely nothing

I forgot how to throw a boomerang and then it came back to me.

What did the teacher say to the student? You failed science

What do you call a 400 pound man eating chocolate? diabetic

A. Knock, Knock B. Come in

Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are yellow Azeleas are pinkish purple

I'm trying to see from Adam Fantuzzi's point of view but i cant stick my head that far up my arse Daniel

A guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink and sighs heavily, waiting to escape the reality of his broken home, his cheating wife, and his high school dropout kid.

Knock knock I don't play games, go away! Knock knock How did you get in my house? Knock knock Stay back I have a weapon! Knock knock What are you!!! Knock knock Oh god, someone please help! Knock knock What do you want, I can give you money. Knock knock Just don't hurt my family, please. Knock knock!!! WHO'S THERE!!! I am.

What's worse than losing $100 at the racetrack? Losing at Russian Roulette

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because 7 ate 9.

A girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

your mothers so over weight that when she jumps in a pool she displaces a proportionately larger volume of water then someone with less body mass.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

420

Knock knock Go fuck yourself

Why did lil' Jimmy fall off his bike? The weight ratio between the left and right sections of his body became uneven due to some sort of change in the traction of the tires to the bumps on the road/ path.

why didn't the chicken cross the road? there are no roads in factory farms.

What's black and white and red all over? A pile of dead, mixed-race babies.

I'M JOSH BROWN!!!!!

What did Annie the Orphan get for Christmas? News that her parents are dead.

What's big and messy? A big mess

So there's this crazy married couple in a old trailer down the road. They are both drunk. The man asks his blond wife, ''Isn't it about time we get married?'' The wife replies ''I wouldn't marry a ugly thing like you!'' The next day, they file a divorce.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...