whats worse than having a gay friend ? 9/11

One day a man runs into a bar. He is already drunk and jumps through the window. This is illeagal, so he was arrested, stoned and killed.

Roses are red, Violets are green, get in my bed, if you know what I mean.

Q. How are a bird and a turtle alike? A. They both fly. Except the turtle.

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

What do you get when you mix a dog with a pool table? I don't know.

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

roses are red violets are blue i have AIDS now so do you.

Why didn't Wendy want to sit down? Because her dad put a hand full of needles in her anus. - D

What's funnier A Ginger or a fat kid A fat ass ginger

A blind man asked me out last night. I told him I was seeing someone...

What happened when the mailman shot the plumber? The plumber died.

Dylan F fell off a bridge Landed in some water and was ok 2 days later he got bit by a shark He is now in a coma

Your mother is so fat that her BMI is larger than average.

Why did the girl fall off of her swing? Because she had no arms.

A man drops a penny between a Jew and a homosexual. The man says "oh excuse me," picks up his penny and continues with his day.

what has 2 legs and is red all over? Half a cat.

What happened to the baby in the microwave? I don't really remember, I was too busy jacking off.

What's black and white and red all over? News paper that was used to cover up a dead body.

why did Kelsey fall off the swing? because she has no arms Knock Knock who's there? not Kelsey

What do you call a gathering of Asians? A chinkfest

Your mom was so fat, She was overweight.

Why can't Tommy ride his bicycle? Because Tommys' bike has a missing pedal.

Why did the fridge cross the road? Because Sally has no arms

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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